EMOTIONAL NIGHT......

I had a really bad night, for some reason all the emotions I've been holding in about my Bonnie overwhelmed me last night. I've been trying so hard to focus on all the good things in my life and preparing for our son. But last night I lost it.

I was feeling sad for all the things she is going to miss out on, the play time in the yard, going to the sprinkler at the park, etc. These are all the things we did with Bonnie and were really looking forward to doing them with Owen and Bonnie. I think the breaker was that I found our christmas card from last year and it was of Bob, me and Bonnie. I had already been talking about this years Christmas card and what Bonnie and Owen would be wearing.

I went from being so happy about the shower, our home visit, Owen's home coming to feeling sad and crying.

I know this will pass but for now, I miss Bonnie and going to allow myself to feel this way.